Value yourself

How to value yourself?

Did you know that where you are today directly results from how much you value yourself?

The amount of success or money coming your way depends on how much you value yourself and how much value you put into the world. Money only exists where there is value. If you want to make money, you need to create value, and this process has to start with yourself. If you do not value yourself, you will not be able to put your full-throttle self out into this world, and this lack of self-value will reflect on your financial matters.

So, let’s begin the journey of self-discovery. What do you value, and how can you create more value for yourself and others?

What does valuing yourself mean?

To start with, people who value themselves take care of themselves. Taking care of yourself does not only mean getting up early in the morning to plan your outfit, putting on make-up and looking like you just stepped out of a salon. Physical appearance is essential, and it’s a great way to value yourself, especially if you’ve been feeling down in the slumps lately. After all, if you look great, you will feel great!

Taking care of yourself also means knowing what is important and how you will spend your time, money and energy. In other words, knowing what you value and focusing all your energy only on what you value will naturally make you feel more valuable! Does this make sense? To demonstrate this point, let’s look at the following example:

Instead of looking at saving your money as depriving yourself of that expensive haircut or having dinner with a group of friends that you weren’t interested in attending in the first place, look at saving money as taking care of yourself, says Kate Northrup (2013), author of the book “Money a Love Story”. Maybe the money you saved can now be used to pay for a qualification you thought you couldn’t afford… Maybe that qualification gets you the promotion you wanted or provides you with the necessary skills to start your own business…? Now, what do you value most? The expensive haircut, a dinner you didn’t want to attend, OR the promotion?

As soon as your life starts to reflect what you truly value and enjoy having in your life, your self-worth will increase, and you will start to add value not only to yourself but also to others in the world.

Here is the BIG question!

Do you know what you value most in life?

How much of the life that you are living right now truly reflects what you value most? Not much…? Do you know what you value most in life? Not sure…? Don’t stress; I am here to guide you through the journey as I discovered a great tool to steer us in the right direction (MindTools, n.d).  First, you need to define what you truly value. An excellent way to start doing this is by reflecting on your life. Identify when you felt perfect and confident that you were making good choices. I recommend that you get a small pocket-size booklet in which you can answer the questions under each step below. I know this is work, but make it fun! The value you will get from completing this exercise will make it well worth the effort!

You need to complete all the steps both for your personal as well as your professional life.

1: Identify when you were the happiest in your life.

  • What were you doing?
  • Were you with other people? Who?
  • What other factors contributed to your happiness?

2: Identify the times that you were most proud of.

  • Why were you proud?
  • Did other people share in your pride? Who?
  • What other factors contributed to your pride?

3: Identify the times that you were most fulfilled and satisfied.

  • What need or desire was fulfilled?
  • How or why did the experience give your life meaning?
  • What other factors contributed to your feelings of fulfilment?

4: Determine your top 10 values.

Base your values on your experiences of happiness, pride and fulfilment. Use the list of common personal values below to help you get started, and then add your own. You might find that some values go together, such as adventurousness and fun – combine them as one value.

Step 5: Prioritise your values.

Prioritise your values, with number 1 being the most important and number 10 being the least important. This is probably the most challenging step, and you must dig deep within yourself. Make sure that your top values are something you are proud of and that makes you happy.

Accountability; Accuracy; Achievement; Adventurousness; Altruism; Ambition; Assertiveness; Balance; Being the best; Belonging; Boldness; Calmness; Carefulness; Challenge; Cheerfulness; Clear-mindedness; Commitment; Community; Compassion; Competitiveness; Consistency; Contentment; Continuous; Improvement; Contribution; Control; Cooperation; Correctness; Courtesy; Creativity; Curiosity.

Decisiveness; Democraticness; Dependability; Determination; Devoutness; Diligence; Discipline; Discretion; Diversity; Dynamism; Economy; Effectiveness; Efficiency; Elegance; Empathy; Enjoyment; Enthusiasm; Equality; Excellence; Excitement; Expertise Exploration; Expressiveness; Fairness; Faith; Family-orientedness; Fidelity; Fitness; Fluency; Focus; Freedom; Fun; Generosity; Goodness; Grace; Growth; Happiness; Hard Work; Health; Helping Society; Holiness; Honesty; Honour; Humility.

Independence; Ingenuity; Inner Harmony; Inquisitiveness; Insightfulness; Intelligence; Intellectual Status; Intuition; Joy; Justice; Leadership; Legacy; Love; Loyalty; Making a difference; Mastery; Merit; Obedience; Openness; Order; Originality; Patriotism; Perfection; Piety; Positivity; Practicality; Preparedness; Professionalism; Prudence; Quality-orientation; Reliability; Resourcefulness; Restraint; Results-oriented; Rigour; Security; Self-actualisation; Self-control; Selflessness; Self-reliance; Sensitivity; Serenity; Service; Shrewdness; Simplicity; Soundness; Speed; Spontaneity; Stability; Strategic; Strength; Structure; Success; Support.

Teamwork; Temperance; Thankfulness; Thoroughness; Thoughtfulness; Timeliness; Tolerance; Traditionalism; Trustworthiness; Truth-seeking; Understanding; Uniqueness; Unity; Usefulness; Vision; Vitality

Taken from: https://www.mindtools.com/a5eygum/what-are-your-values

Step 6: Write a small goal to honour one of your top values.

For example, if family-orientedness is one of your top values and you haven’t spent much time with your family lately, create a goal of doing something with your family each week. Over time, create a goal for your top values, starting with the most important to you. Start small each time you accomplish one of these value goals, “Up the Game”, by creating a larger goal. You will discover that by creating goals around your values, you will be pulled towards these goals – making these goals desirable and fun so that you want to achieve them.

What is the purpose of selecting a goal to support your top values?

To create an ultimate goal that will honour your most crucial self and your core values, for example, choosing a career path that includes the top 5 things that will leave you happy, proud and fulfilled.

If family-orientedness, freedom, making a difference, leadership and wealth are your top 5 values, you will start making everyday choices that align with these values and the goals you have set for them. You would also start saying no to other options not in line with these values to focus your time, money and energy on what is important to you. With time, for example, you will come up with a career path that gives you the freedom to be close to your family, yet at the same time allows you to lead and make a difference in an area that is important to you.

By following through, you will not only start valuing yourself more but your newfound focus and energy will enable you to put your full-throttle value into the world, creating value for others and wealth for all.

Remember that action is critical! If you are not prepared to do what it takes, it is simple; you will not get the value.

Let us not look for reasons why we can’t do something but ask: How can we make it possible?

Happy value hunting!

Article by Jackie Brand, BMT College


MindTools. (n.d). “What are your values?”: Deciding what is important in life. Emerald Works Limited. https://www.mindtools.com/a5eygum/what-are-your-values

Northrup, K. (2013). Money a love story: Untangle your financial woes and create the life you want. Hay House Inc.

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